As kids, we were taught the importance of choosing our battles because at that time, we had the boundless time, energy, and bandwidth to argue anything, regardless of our feelings about it. We never needed to learn how to reign in those powerful emotions and reserve them for the appropriate fight. As we began to get older, life started to pull us in many directions, leaving us with less fight and different priorities. But “way back when” was a different time, a simpler time. Now is much, much different.

Today, we come across a virtual smorgasbord of contemptuous anger fuel online (and in real life) every single day. From gun control to politics to breastfeeding, it seems like everything is fodder for unkind words and negative energy. Most of us successfully navigate these murky waters the majority of the time. But there is always that one post, that one misogynist, that one racist that sparks a fevered rage that can’t be compartmentalized.

So, how do we, as even-tempered, emotionally intelligent adults, react to the trolls that riddle our path? Disengage. Breathe. Refocus. Today’s video has several great ideas on exactly what to do when that happens.

Chances are, getting into an online shouting match with a 58-year-old mother of three in Wichita isn’t going to create radical reform for women’s reproductive rights. And frankly, the comment section on a Buzzfeed article isn’t the time or place to create a sorely needed spiritual shift in the universe.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve created one hard and fast rule these days: STEP AWAY FROM THE COMMENTS SECTIONS. Tussling with trolls never ends well. If you find yourself passionate about a certain issue, there are so many ways to become involved in a progressive movement toward actual change. Leading by example is the ONLY way to be heard. Let’s stop merely talking the talk and strap on our walking shoes.

Today’s video will empower you on the journey of picking your battles – and why you’d even want to in the first place.

I would love to hear from you! How do you keep your cool when you feel offended by a comment? What practices do you avoid or indulge in – whether online or in person? And even better, what ways do you lead by example?

Thank you for being here. In this era of exclusion, separation, and finger-pointing, it’s people like you, who are committed to being the best you can be, that make all the difference. I’m honored to be in your tribe.

Forever your fan,