This post is about the times that you feel unworthy and what you can do to shift that.

My eleven-year-old nephew just came to visit for a week during his spring break. One night we were sitting at dinner and out of nowhere he said, “Ouch! Ooh, it hurts so bad!” I immediately asked him what was wrong; he told me he was having growing pains. I’d totally forgotten about growing pains!

If you have young kids, I’m sure you’re familiar with them, but if it’s been a long time since you had them yourself you, too, may have forgotten all about growing pains…and how good they can be!

So what do growing pains have to do with feeling worthy or not? I’m getting there.

A client of mine was just promoted after only a month of us working together. In her new position she has people reporting to her — an entire division of people reporting to her — and she’s nervous about it. On our last call together she said, “I’m not prepared to have this accountability! They’re going to find that out and then they’ll know that I’m a fraud.”

Have you ever experienced that same fear?

I know I have; just this week I was selected to give a TEDx talk. Despite the fact that I’ve been a public speaker since 1995, I was suddenly terrified. I mean, many of the people I admire most in this world have given TED talks or TEDx talks and I thought, “Who am I? I’m just a cowgirl from Colorado.” Then I started to really get in my head about it; I have epileptic seizures from a head injury I sustained as a teenager. One of the contributing factors to having a seizure is stress, so for a minute I worried, “Oh joy. I finally get a TEDx talk…what if I have a seizure in the midst of it? Now THAT will make my video stand out for sure.”

I stopped, breathed, and took the coaching that I’d given my client earlier that same day. Here it is:

The only reason we have those occasional, “I’m not ready,” or, “I’m not worthy,” conversations is because we’re pressing up against the box in which we’ve been living.

We’re having those conversations in out minds as a direct result of going through a state change like the caterpillar does while inside the chrysalis. If you don’t feel terrified on occasion; if you’re confronted with, “Can I do it?” or the “I’m not ready,” and the “I’m not worthy,” conversations in your head, then consider you’re not stretching yourself; you’re not growing.

Just like they are for my eleven-year-old nephew, growing pains are a good thing.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on your own growing pains — or lack thereof — and what actions you’ll take now.

Thanks for reading and watching!

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